Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Finding the white dots.

Lately I just realized that my post didn’t make any sense with the objectives of the establishment of this blog. Yeah frankly, I still can’t write and published posts which related to Tarbiyyah and purifying the heart.

What does it mean?

Simplest answer would be: my heart still full of black dots. I still can’t find my way. Stumbled in the middle of the road, looking for hands for guidance, and barely gasping the fresh air of Islam.

Menulislah kerana Allah… Am I doing that? Confused…or I just keep on writing to ensure my blog updated?

Hmm… I’m still finding the white dots. The dots which bring the Bless of Allah into my life.

It’s difficult to explain. People might see me as I am, but they can’t dive into my feelings. The feelings which full of black dots. The feelings which driven me to become who I am right now. At this moment. The feelings which reflected my writings.

I’ve lost while sailing in the black ocean. I’ve drowned without being able to reach and hold to the string of Allah..

Maybe this is the screening process from Allah?

Am I the one who supposedly being left alone?

Am I the one who caused the Da’wah moving slowly? Is it because of me?

Am I the one who bring fitnah to Islam?

If that so, now I’m so guilty..

Oo Allah, guide me… please hold my hand.

4 comments:

-aku- said...

Salam,

Bagi ana, post-post mengenai kisah persahabatan adalah sesuatu yang amat menarik.

Kenapa?

Kerana percayalah. Enta sangat beruntung kerana dapat merasai kemanisan ukhuwah ketika di sekolah lagi tapi ana hanya sedar akan kemanisan ukhuwah ni apabila sudah mula kenal dakwah.

Tak semua orang yang membaca blog enta ni orang yang dah kenal dakwah. Ada juga yang baru nak kenal Islam. Jadi, kisah-kisah persahabatan macam ni lah yang mampu menarik minat mereka. Tapi, wallahu'alam. Mungkin target group enta untuk blog enta lain dari target group blog ana.

Walau macam mana pun, dakwah akan terus berjalan, ya akh. Sama ada kita ada, atau pun tidak.

*Kadang-kadang, ada orang yang lebih suka dirinya tidak diketahui orang. Anggap sajalah ana ni saudara semuslim enta. Yang sama-sama berjuang untuk mengembalikan khalifah. Teruskan menulis.

Nabil MJ said...

to aku:
terima kasih banyk2 atas pandangan anda.

really appreciate it.
Mgkin saya perlu lebih bnyk muhasabah.

Insya Allah kita cuba yang terbaik.

"sampaikanlah dariku walau sepatah"

Anonymous said...

ana juga selalu rasa mcm nta rasa...
kadang2 dlm menulis blog ni kta kena rasa dulu b4 nk share...
tapi apa pon sume kta kena latih...

walaupun sesuatu yg kecil if kita dpt grab n share with others ganjaran Allah itu ada...

Nabil MJ said...

to Anonymous:
"kadang2 dlm menulis blog ni kta kena rasa dulu b4 nk share..."

ana ni rasa x rasa main tulis ja..Nak kena latih n didik hati dulu ni..